Please STOP….Just STOP!!
Stop blaming my therapist, stop telling me that everyone else you know has gotten over it, and STOP denying that you didn’t do anything WHEN I told you at the age of 11. I did tell you, and you told me not to tell Daddy, because he would never let me play over there again….guess I should’ve told Daddy. I didn’t need to be playing over there at all. My therapist is HELPING…not having your support is NOT. STOP comparing me to everyone else. Maybe if I had the opportunity to heal a LONG TIME AGO, I would be a little better now, but I didn’t. This just came out. I am only beginning to heal, and your support would help the process progress. I guess I am going to have to figure this out without you. You’ve always been there for me, or so I thought. I guess it’s time to grow up, try things on my own.
Stop blaming my therapist, stop telling me that everyone else you know has gotten over it, and STOP denying that you didn’t do anything WHEN I told you at the age of 11. I did tell you, and you told me not to tell Daddy, because he would never let me play over there again….guess I should’ve told Daddy. I didn’t need to be playing over there at all. My therapist is HELPING…not having your support is NOT. STOP comparing me to everyone else. Maybe if I had the opportunity to heal a LONG TIME AGO, I would be a little better now, but I didn’t. This just came out. I am only beginning to heal, and your support would help the process progress. I guess I am going to have to figure this out without you. You’ve always been there for me, or so I thought. I guess it’s time to grow up, try things on my own.
Sara my dear, I love you so deeply and I want your hurt to go away. I know it is a long process. Please remember that your friends are praying for you and have their arms open to you for ANYTHING. like you said in your post, maybe for now, you'll just have to do this without her. That doesn't mean she doesn't love you and that your relationship with her will never be a good one...i guess it just means that you have to do what's right for YOU. you are such a giving and caring person and that is your biggest strength, but at a time like this, could be a weakness, too. I am praying for you daily to be the strong woman I know you are and I hope you will rely on those around you who are ready to support you I love you!
ReplyDeleteSara, I think that you are so strong for telling and trying to heal. It's hard when as adults we figure out that a parent isn't the who we thought they were. When we are younger we tend to have an idealized version of them in our head. It's okay to keep a distance while you heal. That negative unsupportive energy isn't something you need in your life right now. When she starts acting like a mature, supportive adult you can let her back in again. Love you and support you! San :)
ReplyDeleteI've always known you to be a strong person. I'm proud of you for working through this. As Christians we were taught to honor thy parents, so I can totally understand your dilemma. Since I am a mother now I know that for me I have to worry about what is best for me and my family. I have to do what I need to do to protect my kids. For you, easier said than done, you have to protect you. Now that I'm older I have a respect for my parents for all they have done for me...I can also see their flaws in a new way. I see their opinions are wrong about things and I know I don't want them to voice those things around my kids or me any further. My husband has come to the conclusion that his parents are not nice people at all and we have not had a relationship with them in 2 years. That is a very very hard thing to decide.. especially when you hear the honor thy father and mother in the back of your head. I'm sorry you had to go through this.. and i'm sorry your mom didn't help you. I feel angry for this. Family or stranger... I would do anything...ANYTHING to keep my kids safe and your mom failed you. You told your mom who you trust that something was happening to you.. and since you trusted her you listened to her... that should have never happened! You are strong and I know you will figure a way to work through this with God's help and with time.
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